Thursday, December 09, 2004

Field Trip!

Alright everybody, pack up the vans, we're going on a field trip to the almost open Creation Museum! This is a great addition to the Christian experience, making it possible to combat the secular natural history museums that "proclaim an evolutionary, humanistic worldview. For example, they will typically place dinosaurs on an evolutionary timeline millions of years before man. AiG’s museum will proclaim the authority and accuracy of the Bible from Genesis to Revelation, and will show that there is a Creator, and that this Creator is Jesus Christ (Colossians 1:15-20), who is our Savior."

Costing a modest 25 million dollars, the museum is located just outside of Cincinnati, OH. This is a strategic, evangelical location because "About 2/3 of America’s population can drive to Cincinnati in one day! In addition to those 165 million Americans, millions of Canadians in the provinces of Ontario and Quebec can also drive here in one day."

While we're waiting for the museum to actually open, a virtual tour is available that only creates greater excitement for this great addition to christendom. In addition to several gift shops and eating opportunities "that’ll strengthen your walk with the Creator and embolden your defense of His Word", the highlight of the tour may be the Bible Authority Room: "The Bible is true. No doubt about it! Paul explains God’s authoritative Word, and everyone who rejects His history—including six-day creation and Noah’s Flood—is ‘willfully’ ignorant." Also, the walk through creation area allows families to visit the tree of life and perhaps even take an apple themselves from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil! There is a dramatic representation of the first loss of life and the tour includes a face to face encounter with the tempter himself. Ultimately, the story includes a walk through the Ark and a quick skip to the cross where "3-D dioramas show the ‘Last Adam’ pay for the first Adam’s sin and then rise from the grave to conquer death." From there, visitors can rest by the plaza fountain and "relax by a waterfall, enjoy a refreshing drink and reflect on everything you’ve experienced."

This virtual tour is one of the most remarkable things I've ever experienced. I am hoping that my seminary student status may grant me an advanced visit to the museum before the doors are officially opened. For more info on Ken Ham, the museum founder who bear a remarkable resemblance to Christian philosopher Al Plantinga, see this article that explains how Ham sees dinasours as evangelistic lizards and believes they were around at the time of Jesus Christ. I believe I met this guy, or one of his followers, when I was a kid at homeschool club. Anyway, I'll see all of you at the museum opening.


At 12/10/2004 9:48 AM, Blogger Dusty said...

Oh Gosh...Please tell me this is a joke. I mean obviously it is a joke, but please tell me they think it is funny too!

If not, I think I may want to get off this whole know, like the planet!!!

Unbelievable...It better be a darn good apple!

At 12/11/2004 3:29 AM, Blogger jonny said...

Oh ho ho! Someone forgot how awesomely cool I think creation science is, even if it's not science at all!

To be fair, the location is strategic. Why the heck do you think the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Museum is in Cleveland? Because of the world famous, cumbustible Cuyahoga River? No. Because Cleveand is "within 500 miles of 43% of the U.S. population-less than a day's drive or an hour's flight from many major cities in the U.S. and Canada." That's from their website. This isn't absurd. This really is good business sense.

(And comparatively speaking, the $25 million pricetag is relatively modest stacked against the $84 million that went to build the R&R Musuem. Plus, the money makes more sense in my mind spent on an awesome dinosaur museum than on another 25 "activity centers" for local evangelical churches who don't want to use the BB courts down at the YMCA.)

Oh yeah, and my favorite part! Ken Ham!!! The guy is Australian, so right off, he's cooler than every American Christian smashed together. I read a book by him in high school called Evolution: The Lie which had this big painting of a snake (i.e. Satan) coiling around an apple. There were even these rad pictures inside that you could copy onto transparencies to show your friends and family how uncool evolution was. I never did, but I definately thought about it.

So even though we're all way more "advanced" than these fundmentalists, they have every right to build awesome dinosaur heads and Bible Authority Rooms. And they have every right to read every sentence in the Bible literally (though they don't, because I know for a fact that they hate open theism). But I'm getting off topic.

My main points: Museums are awesome. Dinosaur museums are even more awesome. And dinosaur museums curated by Australian Christians are the most awesome.

So new topic, or else I'll start posting about PM again. And I will, even though just thinking about it makes me want to puke into a bucket.


(p.s. that was the sound of me puking, into a bucket)

At 12/11/2004 6:49 AM, Blogger erica*ann said...

first, on a serious note, i, um..., tend to LOVE dinos.
secondly, i'm totally going to get an annual pass to this tizzy of an idea.

so -- there you have it. okay?


At 12/13/2004 4:29 PM, Blogger Jake Sikora said...

Jonny- you made the mistake of not taking my post literally! I really am planning on going to this museum when it is open. sure i think it's mostly ridiculous but totally awesome at the same time. so there. it would be great. i'll see you there.


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